Aidan's Sickly Holiday

Aidan had a great holiday, even though he was very sick throughout most of it. In the middle of the night on Saturday he threw up. The coughing had begun on Friday but Jason thought it was asthma and allergy related since he himself had also been coughing. When Aidan woke up on Sunday, he just wanted to lay in bed. That's when we knew this was not just a passing bug.

His Papaw Steve and Fabyan visited him on Sunday. He was in bed for most of the day but did manage to open a few early presents. Monday was a wee bit better and he was able to hang out with his visitors before they left, but he was back in bed in the afternoon. Uncle Stevie, Nana, and Papa came for dinner, along with our special guests Jane and Noonie! Of course, there were early presents then too. Monday night was better but still rough, with Aidan having to sleep on me sitting up so that he could breathe without throwing up, although sporadically throughout day and night he had been losing whatever was left in his stomach.

Tuesday was better still and Aidan was so excited to open the rest of his presents. I tried not to go overboard this year because Santa had told me that he was bringing a bike and helmet. Plus with the impending move I do not want to accumulate more stuff. Family also complied, sending only small sized items.

Besides the bike and helmet, Aidan got lots of games and movies. He also got some crocs and a bath robe with his name on it. After opening his bath robe he cried because he was expecting toys. I think his favorite gift was a spiderman halloween costume I found on clearance. When he and Nana dropped me at work they were on their way to McDonald's and he was wearing his spiderman costume! He may not ever take it off.

The best news is that his appetite is back, and even though we've been avoiding McDonald's, he plans to eat so I'm not complaining. I hope to figure out how to post video, so stay tuned for the bike riding video we made this morning. He was a little intimidated at first, but once on the bike and moving, he did just fine. What a big boy!

Could I Get Some Communication Over Here?

When Jason told me Aidan would do fine at the dentist, he went on and on about how great things went the last time and how impressive Aidan was in the chair. Jason did say that Aidan had issues with the chair because it tilts back so far that his head is a little upside down, but I was ready for that. I just reminded Aidan on the way in there that the chair was upside down and then we laughed about it. So no problem on the chair. And from what Jason told me, this would be the only issue. The chair.

I was fairly unhappy with the rest of the visit and last night after Aidan went to bed I told Jason all about it. As I started giving the series of events, Jason began giving me details of his visit like, "Oh yeah, you needed to stand up next to him and hold his hand." Hmmm, that wasn't told to me. When I went into the room I just asked the assistant and she told me to sit in the chair in the corner. So I wasn't holding Aidan's hand or patting him. Since the lady told me to sit across the room, I assumed that it was part of the drill. I tell Jason this and he looks totally shocked and begins to tell me how I should've helped him and reassured him. "Well, gee, Jason. I guess I would have if you had given me the real low down on what needed to be done and on what Aidan would need."

And it proceeded from there. One instance after another, Jason told me about the therapy he gave Aidan while the dentist worked on his teeth at the last visit. Again, information I could have used!

First Day of Winter Break

What a crazy week we're having. Yesterday was the last day of school for winter break, although Aidan was convinced that it was his last day forever. Now that the blog is on lockdown, I can type freely about our impending move and Aidan's reservations about it. He kept telling me that he didn't want to move to Texas after Christmas and that he wanted to go back to his school. At this point we've convinced him that he's going back there and he'll see all of his friends again after the holidays. Clearly it's a preview of what we'll deal with this summer.

This morning Aidan had two teeth filled. I'm not the person for that job. It didn't go well, let's just leave it at that. Afterward I had to go to Jason's work to have him talk to Aidan about why chewing on cotton is important. Not that it mattered, Aidan chewed a hole in his lip and now it's swollen a bit. Hopefully it will go down by tomorrow.

In an effort to make Aidan feel a bit better, we went to Ihop where Aidan ate a cheeseburger and french fries. He hadn't been allowed to have breakfast, so he ate like he hadn't eaten in days. Even the waitress was amazed. Even I was amazed and I've seen him eat a lot. Our lunch was followed by ice cream and then by a movie. The movie was cute, but Aidan fell asleep about halfway through and when I woke him he was disoriented and grumpy. The rest of our day was better and ended with Aidan helping me clean house. He's such a great little helper!

Rinaldo Look-alike Meter

MyHeritage: Celebrity Collage - Family pictures

More Cute Pictures

These were taken by someone else at the party.

A Day Full of Holiday

Our Sunday started off in the family bed. Aidan had awoken quite early, so Jason brought him in with us in hopes that we'd all get a little more sleep before we were forced to accept that our day was going to begin with or without our permission. We talked about how we were planning to attend both Aidan's school Hanukkah party and Jason's company Christmas party all in the same day. So, then the questions start. "Are we Jewish? Are we Christian?" We talked about the differences between the two and how there are many other religions as well and then we talked about generalized similarities and differences. We talked about the various ethnicities and religions of the people we know. It was a nice conversation, one that I mentioned to his teacher at the party. Her response was, "Aidan has great questions." Yes, he does.

The Hanukkah party was a lot of fun. I was not aware that Aidan had been learning so many songs in both Hebrew and English. He belted out as loud as he could on the songs he likes the most. I was sort of shocked to hear it, as he doesn't sing like that at home. His school has hired a new music teacher who will come weekly next semester. Aidan seemed to respond well to him. The latkes and applesauce were good too.

And then we attended the Christmas party. It's a dinner party with both kids and adults, but otherwise very formal. Aidan wore his dinner jacket, which he liked wearing very much (which is weird, since he's violently objected in the past). The CEO's wife told Aidan early in the evening that Santa will come right after dinner (probably around dessert time) and that he sometimes comes from the top of the stairs and looks over the landing before descending to the dining room.

Aidan strategically positioned himself at the table to have a great view of the stairwell. As soon as he started to eat his ice cream, a very loud, "Ho, Ho, Ho" came from above. Aidan shot up to his feet on his chair and turned to get a great view of Santa. He then shot out of his chair and ran to greet Santa at the bottom of the stairs, then followed him to the chair next to the fireplace, where Aidan sat quietly until Santa was ready to greet him. He happily sat on Santa's lap to get his gift when his name was called but he wouldn't open his gift because I had told him that he couldn't open any gifts until Christmas. I then had to explain that if Santa gives you a gift early, you can go ahead and open it.

Later Santa gave out huge Hershey's kisses sort of like this one, only Christmas themed. I was talking to someone behind me and was trying to appease Aidan by cutting off a chunk for him, when he took the huge chunk of chocolate out of my hand and started eating it like it was an apple! After which he got incredibly hyper and started running full speed around the room. Jason just ignored it as I was racing after Aidan trying to slow him down. See pics.

Boring Saturday

Today was a very good day. Jason had to work this morning, although we thought he would work the entire day. Aidan and I wrapped some gifts and spent quality time together. He told me it was like having his mommy for a babysitter. I didn't really know how to take that since Jason is always with him when I work. Are those times like having Daddy for a babysitter? Or was it just weird this time b/c Mommy is usually the one working on non-school days? And should I take that to mean that I'm not spending enough time with him? Well, let me tell ya, he'll get sick of seeing me during his holiday break.

Turned out Jason only worked until about noon, so I was able to get some work done at home for a couple of hours and didn't need to go into the office at all. I needed to go out to the mall to look for clothes for our two parties tomorrow. I didn't find anything, but Aidan sure had fun at the indoor playground.

Aidan ran into one of his old classmates from the old (bad) school. Her mom told me that they had left just before we did and it was basically for the same sorts of reasons. There were problems and the teachers and/or director either did not want to or didn't know how to deal with them. I cannot believe that he had an entire year there with no issues and then suddenly he goes to a new class and all goes to pot.

We're very happy to be in the new school, although Aidan keeps asking why he's not Jewish and why we have him in a Jewish school if he's not Jewish. I think he gets it when I explain that it's just a better school with better teachers and that he learns a lot there. I don't get into the fact that it's a multicultural experience. I just smile to myself when I hear him using terms like shofar, menorah, and dreidel. Although I was a little dismayed when he told me that the Hannukah song is sung in Spanish. I corrected him, but he adamantly disagreed.

The Wonder of the Holidays

Yesterday it was getting yucky out and I was leaving the library to go back to the office at 3, and I decided to blow off the rest of the day and pick Aidan up early. Jason was going out to look for tile after work and since Aidan and I had nothing to do, we went out to the mall to check out the holiday happenings. We peeked at Santa from the sidelines but Aidan wasn't really interested in visiting him. Besides, Santa will be at Jason's company party on Sunday handing out gifts.

We looked at lots of stuff but bought nothing. Aidan really enjoyed the Disney Store, where he'd never before been. To be honest, I was a bit disappointed in their holiday spread. Aidan completely shocked me when he recognized and named the Build-A-Bear Workshop. He went right in, looked around at everything, walked over to the computer that was saying, "Push the green button." And then he started pushing buttons on the keyboard in the correct sequence as if he had done this a million times. I'm starting to think he might benefit from a toddler computer soon, but we'll hold off a bit.

Again tonight Jason is going shopping for tile and I'll be entertaining Aidan. I'm not sure what exactly we'll do tonight but I'm thinking we'll probably just go home and read some books or play with his toys. What he loves the very most is imaginative playing with Little People animals, building blocks, and reading Curious George. Any of those three will make him a very happy little boy.

Paying for IQ

Aidan is such a great kid. But, of course, we all knew that. This morning before school we watched Dora and there was a riddle: "What goes up when the rain comes down?" So here I am, I'm thinking. The cloud? Well, the cloud will go away when the rain stops and the sun will come out. The sun? Hmmm...I should be able to figure this out. So then Aidan yells (because Dora the Explorer encourages kids to yell at the TV), "An umbrella!" Then I notice that there is a character behind Dora pushing his umbrella up each time the rain comes down. Didn't I feel way too literal?

That was the highlight of our morning since the rest of the time we were fighting over changing clothes, putting on socks and shoes, brushing teeth, etc., etc., etc. And all of that made us really late for school and it made me very frazzled. So, I was telling his teachers how we had a bad morning and how he said he wants to make all the rules. One of his teachers told me in the hallway that Aidan is really smart. So I chuckle and tell her about the Dora riddle from earlier. And then she says, "No, I mean, like, he's one of the smartest ones." Another teacher has said this to us on occasion too. I don't really know how to feel about this because as I try to think about how great that is, all I can hear in my head is the "cha-ching" of money flying out of our bank accounts to pay for private schools for the rest of his life.

Aidan Goes to the Dentist

Yesterday Aidan went to the dentist for the very first time. Jason picked him up from school just before nap. I met them there as the appointment was ending. I made Jason go with him the first time because after the appointment was made, Jason started instructing me on what I needed to find out. I decided that I was not the person for the job, if Jason wanted to know specific things, he needed to go. So he did.

So I met them there and I was very impressed with the place. They had two doors going into the office from the waiting room, one for adults and a short one for kids. The receptionist goes to the little door and calls the child's name. In general, they are all about developing the relationship with the kid and try hard to keep the interaction with the adult to a minimum while the actual exams are going on.

Jason says that Aidan did extremely well. I guess at first there was some issue with the first hygienist, but after that Aidan relaxed and let them clean his teeth. Jason went on and on about how well he did.

Unfortunately, the dentists says that Aidan has three cavities. This is very frustrating for us since we feel like we have been very stern about tooth brushing and sweets. It's true that he's increased sweets as he's gotten older but he eats everything. It's not like sweets are the majority of what he eats. Most candy is off limits to him b/c of the peanut allergy, so there isn't even that much that he can have.

The verdict was that Aidan has very deep grooves and pits in his teeth naturally, which makes it harder to brush out the food. We didn't know that we could have taken him to get sealants and we got some bad advice. Aidan's pediatrician told me that most dentists will not see a child before the age of 3, which is the recommended age for the first dentist trip. On another occasion we had a conversation in passing with an adult dentist who claimed that kids have to be older than 3 to get sealants. Now we find out from Aidan's dentist that he could have had the sealants, which would have prevented the cavities. Luckily, these are just baby teeth, so they will fill them and seal them to last until they are no longer needed. All at the low, low cost of $600.

Aidan's Christmas Wish List

Relatives have asked to give them some idea of what Aidan might want this year from Christmas. We've been keeping a list of items that Aidan plans to ask Santa for. Check back often, as I will be editing it by adding things he decides he wants and removing things that people have opted to give him. These items are meant to give grandparents and aunts/uncles a general idea. Also, we appreciate your keeping in mind that smaller items are better.

1. Age appropriate games:
Candy Land; Elefun flying butterfly game
Memory Game
2. Crayola Color Wonder (these are markers, paints, etc.)-- he loves these and is running out of what we have currently
3. Movies
Wizard of Oz; Firehouse Dog; he hasn't gotten any movies that are new in the last year
4. Matchbox pop-up racetrack (pops out of a folding box)
5. Lightning McQueen umbrella
6. Bike and helmet (this will probably come from Santa)
7. UK clothes
8. Arts and Crafts Stuff: paints, glitter, clay, colorful paper (construction, tissue, etc.), washable markers.

Remember, check back often for an updated list. Also, please let me know if you have chosen to buy something on the list b/c other relatives will want to know!

So Happy Together

Aidan was out of school three days this week. While it set me back a bit with work, it was a lot of fun to spend that time with him and way overdue. On Wednesday we drove to Richmond to pick up Daddy's watch. On our way back into town, we stopped off at the bike shop to pick up some dissertation stimuli and then met Daddy for lunch.

Thursday was a lot more fun. We met Aidan's friend Dominic at Kid's Place at 10 AM and we didn't leave until 2 PM! The boys had so much fun that they didn't want to leave. In true Rinaldo style, each day got a little more grand. Friday was spent at the aquarium.

Our time at the aquarium was pretty fun, we saw the animals many times, touched the sharks, and even watched the dive show. But then we heard that the Shark Rays were going to be fed. It was quite a sight! We stood in the tunnel and watched as a diver fed Sweet Pea lobster. At one point Sweet Pea was swimming around with lobster claws hanging out of her mouth. As she dropped some here and there, other small fish were cleaning up her crumbs. I've never seen anything quite like that. Aidan and I really enjoyed it.

I guess we did too much this week b/c Aidan was sick last night with vomiting and diarrhea. He seems much better today, so I guess we just picked up a little bug on one of our adventures this week. I'm glad to be getting back to work today but we sure enjoyed our time together.

The Significance of Food

Things are going well for Aidan. He's been able to eat one piece of candy per day, which he has all but forgotten about at this point. In the interest of saving money and promoting family time, we've been working together to cook really yummy/healthy meals and all eat together at the table. This is something I've wanted to implement for a very long time, but even when we did cook meals at home, we often ate wherever we sat down.

All three of us have been really good about being here when we need to eat, working together to get the food cooked, and sitting down together for good food and conversation. My dream is to always have that time together. No matter what hours we are working, I want us to meet each night for a healthy dinner at our table.

It also doesn't depress us that we're losing weight. Jason and I take our leftovers for lunches. It seems to be really paying off for me, I'm not sure what his story would be. With his increased issues with the asthma and other breathing issues, healthy eating is becoming more and more crucial. Family dinners are a great way to incorporate all of the values that are most important to us.

Hallow's Eve

Another year of trick or treating has come and gone. Aidan had a great time, he sported last year's costume for his first trip around the block. Then he came back to put on his knight costume. Unfortunately, we forgot to take the camera. I guess I forgot since I was the one coming from home and Jason met us at the Castaneda household. I had lots of stuff to carry. The camera just didn't make it.

Aidan is pretty good about sorting the candy. He knows that if we say it's not safe, then it's not safe. He never has questioned it. He knows it's serious business. But it's still stressful for us that he walks around with a bucket of peanut butter candy. About half of his candy was off-limits. We had no time to go through the second haul, so Jason just left it all for Kim and Jay. In reality, most of the candy at our house is going in the garbage anyway. Jay can always take it to his students. I think Aidan really enjoyed himself. He saw lots of scary houses and costumes.

We were up and out a little early this morning b/c I had to be at UK to help someone with an exam. Since we've not turned the time back yet, Aidan was disturbed that it was still dark-ish at 8 AM. I tried to explain that the seasons change and it gets dark longer and longer and then we have to change the clocks so that it all feels like it goes back to normal. I'm not sure he understood, but he stopped asking questions.

Getting To Normal and Halloween

Since I last wrote, a lot has happened. We've been to Wyoming and back again, saw Old Faithful and some other stuff out west. Aidan is finally in preschool on a regular basis again. Our schedule is as dysfunctional as ever. I think we're all finally beginning to feel normal again. And are we glad!

Like the rest of the free world, we've been gearing up for Halloween. Aidan has chosen a knight costume to wear on his trick or treat. Mostly he wanted the sword, which has been confiscated until Halloween because he just couldn't stop himself from hitting people with it. We're going on several days of celebrating at this point. Over the weekend we carved pumpkins, roasted the seeds, and made s'mores. Tomorrow night we'll watch It's the Great Pumpkin, Charlie Brown. Wednesday we'll go on our annual trek to Ruby's house, where Aidan has gone trick or treating every year that he's been alive. Even before our kids were considered, we've gotten together with Kim and Jay on Halloween. I'm not sure that we'll know how to do Halloween without them...wow, that's sad.

In general, I'm amazed by how quickly Aidan is growing up. Sometimes he pretends to need help with just about everything, while at other times he insists that he do everything by himself. He also seems very tall to me, even if he's quite short for his age. When I go in to wake him in the mornings, I just watch him lay there and think about how small he used to be. He looks so long laying in his bed. How did he grow so big, so fast? I was gone so much in the last several months...and I am amazed at how much he grew when I wasn't looking!

Together Again

Aidan is very glad that both Mommy and Daddy are home. Although things are still a little hectic due to getting resettled and readjusted, everyone is relieved to be calm before the storm. We have one more trip that we're making into a family getaway and then it gets crazy. Let's just say that once our decisions are made, there are lots of things that have to be done. The largest of which is the dissertation.

I'm sad that I feel like I've lost two months and now it's cold. I found myself pulling out sweatshirts and jackets yesterday. Our trip to Wyoming will also be very, very cold. And snowy. Aidan says he wants to go mountain climbing. We'll see.

Making It All Work

For the overview, Ohio went well, St. Louis not so well, and I'm staring down Texas. Feeling sort of tired. I'm glad Jason will be with me in Texas.

Aidan is out of school for Rosh Hashanah today and tomorrow, so we've been having a good time. Although I'm feeling a little stressed about the dissertation and my upcoming trips, I also love having this time with him. I really missed him last weekend. Having it all really sucks sometimes. Professional mommies forget to tell you that until after you are in the club.

The rest of the high holy days are among us, so we'll have several more weeks where he'll be home with me for a day or two. Oh, how he enjoys being out of school!

Aidan's Asthma and Mommy's Tour Dates

In general, Aidan is doing really well. His asthma has been acting up a bit, but thanks to a trip to the doctor last month, we're armed with all the right meds for getting him through this attack. We've been very lucky that his attacks tend to be mild but lasting for a few days rather than life-threatening with immediate and unexpected onset. He's not been great about doing his breathing treatments in the morning but he admits that they make him feel better, so he does them with relatively little resistance.

The fall is finally upon us and the season that we've been anticipating starts this week. For those of you who are interested, here is a list of my Fall, 2007 National Tour:

September 6-8: Ohio
September 9-10: St. Louis
September 20-23: Texas
September 30-October 3: Oregon
October 7-9: Oklahoma

The good news is that Jason and I only have one brief overlap in travel, but Aidan's Nana has offered to help us out. In addition, Jason will be joining me on at least one of my tour dates, so Nana has agreed to take Aidan those dates as well. We are going to owe her big. I wonder if she's anticipating that...hmmm...

I Dream of Ruby

Today we had lunch with our friends Kim and Jay and their adorable Ruby. Aidan is very fond of Ruby and as he realizes he's outgrown a toy he insists that Ruby needs it next. He often will tell me, "I don't want this anymore. Let's give it to Ruby."

So anyway, today we were at Don Pablo's and Ruby was throwing pennies in the fountain. Jason didn't have any change, so Aidan asked if he could throw a credit card in the fountain. There's something weird in that. This must be the effect of our consumer society as well as the advent of debit cards. Or maybe we just spend too much money. Perhaps we should investigate that.

After lunch we had to go by Ruby's house to pick up a textbook that Jay was lending me, and Aidan discovered Ruby's ball pit. It's a blown up baby pool full of balls! He loved it! He and Ruby were lying down in the balls while Jason and Kim shook the pool so that the balls were flying all over them. Those kids laughed and laughed. It was really too bad that we couldn't stay. He was very happy to be seeing Ruby today and didn't want to leave her in the end. In general, I think he doesn't see enough of her. We really need to work on that.

A Safe Cheat

On the way home tonight Aidan was watching "Bear in the Big Blue House" in the car. On the show they were playing checkers. He's never seen checkers and asked if we had some. We said yes and agreed to show him how to play when we got home. Once home, we got the checkers out, which took some doing because we haven't had any games out in quite a while and even then I don't think we played checkers.

At first Jason tried to show him how to play by playing against him. That didn't work. I offered to play Jason so that Aidan could watch and both felt like that would be a good method, so we started playing. Aidan was enjoying the game until I took one of their checkers. Then he got a weird look on his face and was concerned. When he realized that I could just take their guys by jumping them and that this could mean that I'd win, he started taking my checkers off the board! He was cheating!

It was interesting to me to observe my own competitiveness about it. Sure, it's just a game and it's only purpose was to demonstrate the game to Aidan, but I still was feeling very competitive with Jason because, well, let's face it. Jason and I are always competitive. So this one time when Jason probably would have let me win, Aidan stole my checkers right out from under my nose, literally.

In other news, Aidan and his friend from next door were going outside to "sword fight" (which consists of two plastic baseball bats and a plastic broom). Aidan insisted that they go to the front yard and was resisting going in the backyard even though everyone, including his friend, was saying otherwise. When we finally talked him into going to the backyard to play, he revealed that the backyard needed to be cleaned up. He simply didn't feel it was safe to sword fight in the backyard when there were balls and toys all over. He said they might fall and hurt themselves. My adorable little boy is putting safety first. What a sweet little guy!

Easing the Anxiety

Today was a good day. Aidan was happier this morning and didn't give too much of a fuss at drop off. The director of the school spoke with me about Aidan's anxiety around napping. I didn't know that there are several other younger kids in the class who cry at nap time. This is apparently really stressing Aidan out. They are considering putting him in the older room for naps since there is no crying in that room. What a great school this is. You have an issue and they help you resolve it.

Our next step is to find out what time other mommies pick up their kids. Apparently Aidan is the last kid to be picked up and he is sad about it. If I can find out when his little friends start to leave, I'll get him a little earlier. I'll just have to get up earlier in the morning and work harder during the day. He's worth that.

School Days

There have been some rough mornings this week. We've talked a lot about what the issues are and it's always the same thing: "It's too long." He loved going half days three days a week in summer. And now he goes all day five days a week. It probably is too long for him, but I've got so much going on that I just cannot have him in half days. Plus we've already signed on for full days and they can't reduce it once the school year starts.

It's clear that he likes the school and has a good time. He just seems to want to move on to something else in the afternoon. Plus he hates that they make him nap. It probably isn't a coincidence that he started saying it was too long after they stopped being able to play outside due to the heat. Once it cools off and they can go out, things will probably be better again.

Regardless of his resistance, he has none of the complaints or stories that he had about the other school. He doesn't talk about how someone got in trouble for undressing dolls, or how Timmy's mommy came in to spank him. Now his biggest concern is that he wasn't allowed to paint with his hands yesterday. It's a great feeling to be able to completely trust that he's being well cared for there. At the other place, I was only secure when he was in the 2-year-old class and that now seems like it was years ago, even though it was just this past Spring.

Monday, Monday

Mondays are hard for everyone. It's just generally accepted. There are even songs about it. I think that song is Aidan's Monday anthem since it says, "How could you leave and not take me?" He's so sad when I take him to school on Mondays and today was no exception.

He made me show him what was in his lunch before we went and he told me which foods he didn't want. I told him that he likes cheese ravioli and that he should try it but that if he doesn't like it, he should just not eat it. Then he started in on the nap. I think both lunch and nap may be causing some anxiety for him. We'll have to work on lunches. Maybe he can help me shop for his food and help to make his lunch.

Truth is that it bothers me because I totally get it. And I hate to tell him it's not going to get much better from here.

What A Full Saturday

Aidan finally got his wish to visit the zoo. I heard them up very early rummaging around, getting ready to go. Not surprising, when I got up to help out they actually didn't have much ready, even though Jason said they'd been up for quite a while. They were both dressed but that was about it. I was able to get them out the door pretty quickly with hats and sunblock and snacks and all the other random stuff they needed.

So off they went with all their equipment. Since it's been a billion degrees for the last two weeks, they were very lucky that today was extremely nice. The perfect day for a trip to the zoo. The afternoon was spent at the Newport Aquarium. Elephants in the morning, sharks in the afternoon. We don't know where we'll be living in the long run, but we really need to be close to a zoo and an aquarium. That's for sure.

When they got almost home Jason called me to say that Aidan was crying because he missed his mommy. Once home Aidan got his snuggle on, colored with the new markers I got him today, and then instructed us on where to stand in the backyard so that he could practice "catch." Once it got dark he and his daddy pitched a tent in the yard. They claim they are sleeping out there all night. Hmmm...ought to be interesting!

I asked Jason how they were going to manage without me in a few weeks when I start my campus visits. Aidan got all excited and started talking about how they are going to play baseball in the house and muttered something about a swimming pool. Sounds like a lot of fun now but if Jason can't even get him ready to go to the zoo by himself and Aidan can't make it all day without crying because he misses his mommy, things are probably not going to go as well as they think!

The Snuggler

My boy LOVES to snuggle. Since the moment he came out, he has wanted to be touched at all times by some loving person, usually his mommy. At his last school we were told frequently how they were working with him on personal space issues. He would sit in circle and insist on touching the child next to him, which the other children loathed.

I'm not sure if this is a natural state for all children or some genetic predisposition for my child, but there are obvious evolutionary reasons why a child would want to snuggle. It makes me crazy when I meet parents who insist that you should set boundaries with your children because they have to learn that parents are separate from themselves. I guess I can't understand that because I feel it's not true. Our children are a part of us. Forever.

We've gone through stages with the snuggling. Sometimes he doesn't seem to need it at all, while at other times he insists on snuggling with the parent of his choice, which is still almost always Mommy. For the past several evenings, he has asked to snuggle with me before bed. This is my very favorite time of day because I know it won't be long before he's snuggling with some other woman. And as Jason loves to point out, she probably won't like me.

What A Great Week

Even though our week started out a little rough with Aidan's stomach bug, things have really been looking up for him for the remainder of the week. After his first day of preschool he told me that his teacher "is really nice." And although he says he doesn't want to go to school in the mornings, he goes with relatively little problem. He's in a great mood in the afternoons as well and gives details of his day from time to time. Yesterday he said that it was too hot to go outside but that the social hall was not open for play, so they had to play in the classroom all day. And he wasn't really complaining about it. I'd say he's happy there.

In addition to being pretty happy at school, Aidan got to see Noonie and Jane twice this week. And Daddy says that if Aidan is a good boy all day and if he goes to bed on time tonight so that he can wake early tomorrow, they will go to the Cincy zoo in the morning. Who could ask for anything more?

As far as the school is concerned, Jason says that the director told him that they are very happy to have Aidan at their school. She used "sweet" and "just a joy" to describe his personality. It made me reflect on the comments from his teacher at Crestwood who said that he was defiant and she couldn't get him to do anything. Hmmm, maybe it's the approach. I tried to tell her that but she wouldn't listen. After all, she's got "18 years of experience!"

When The Cat's Away...

...the mice really do play! While Simon was off at his kitty spa and we were in D.C., a little mouse moved in. We saw evidence of it right away (of course) and threw out the snack drawer food that he'd has his way with. Aidan has been somewhat fascinated with the idea of Simon eating the mouse and has asked several mornings if Simon ate our mouse overnight. He finally stopped asking after consecutive negative responses.

Last night I heard some weird sounds, so I made Jason get up to check the doors. When Jason didn't come back I got worried that a burglar had silently murdered him and was rummaging through our things (because I could hear lots of weird scratching and thumping). Turns out Simon had gotten the mouse and Jason was watching the torture. Jason finally trapped the mouse in a tall trashcan and put him out in the garage so that Aidan could see him this morning. Because the mouse was very still, Aidan asked if it were dead. It wasn't. Just scared.

I think Aidan was fascinated that Simon had caught the little mouse. After they left for school I took the mouse over to a church parking lot and set it free. The poor little thing looked so sad. Hopefully he won't find his way back over to our house because there are no second chances.

Another Sick Day

Aidan seems to be feeling better, although he missed the second day of preschool because he was blowing out of both ends this morning. It was quite sad. I was sure it was botulism but off we went to the doctor to get a second opinion. I was assured that there is indeed a stomach virus going around. I got the usual, a prescription for Phenergan and advice on how to watch for and prevent dehydration.

After leaving the doctor and dropping our prescription at the pharmacy, we had to go to Mommy's work. I had some paperwork that absolutely had to be turned in today by 2 PM. Had I known then how difficult it would be, I would've just found some alternative way to handle it. We walked to my office from the only available parking spot. Remember, it's a college campus so even though it was relatively close, it wasn't really that close. Aidan insisted that I carry him most of the way.

Once in the office I was able to distract him with markers and paper while I completed my paperwork and sorted through the work I needed to take home. A colleague stopped in and Aidan started yelling, "Puke!" We ran into the bathroom to take care of business and ended up having to change clothes. Thank God I had the forethought to bring extra clothes!

All we had left to do was walk across campus to drop off the paperwork, then walk to the car, then get the medicine, then home. So here I was carrying my bag stuffed with my computer and my papers, dragging my sick 3-year-old across campus. He was not happy. He screamed for me to pick him up most of the way. I mostly just explained that it was not possible for me to carry both him and my bag and I kept walking.

After we dropped off the paperwork my little guy insisted that we sit down to rest. So we did. He was sick, after all. After our short rest we set out for the car. It was very hot and my bag was getting very heavy. Not too far into our walk Aidan started to scream and cry for me to pick him up. Again I explained that he's too heavy and my bag is about as heavy, so it's just not possible. He stopped in front of me and sat down on the sidewalk. Wow, what a stubborn child we have. Where did this come from?

So, of course, I carried him and my bag the entire way to the car. He was so exhausted that he just put his head on my shoulder and whimpered. By the time we got to the car I was hot, sweaty, and aching. I also wasn't so nice to him as I explained that I was very tired and hungry and I really, really needed him to help me out by being nice to me. He fell asleep before we even got the medicine from the drive-thru.

After one short and one long nap, he was feeling a lot better tonight. He even went outside to play baseball and enjoyed telling the next door neighbor boy about how he had runny poopy in his underwear while puking in the bathtub. That must be a boy thing.

The Real Reason Rove is Stepping Down...

The moms are coming after him!

Preschool Delay

Just after bath last night Aidan was feeling very warm. Sometime in the middle of the night the illness kicked in and we heard him puking in his bed. He had several episodes after that but then eventually went back to his bed. Needless to say, he missed his first day of school. I hope that it doesn't make a big difference for him. At least in his case he's been there this summer and he knows one of his teachers from then also, so it won't be like he's the newest kid with everyone else having been there the day before. We hope he'll be better tomorrow and will be able to go but he's feeling pretty bad today and has been sleeping a lot.

Over the weekend Jason and Aidan tried twice to go to the zoo. Both days they couldn't go because Aidan had avoided bedtime the night before and couldn't get up early enough to beat the heat. In the middle of the night as we put him back in his bed, he looked up at us and with his weak, sickly voice said, "Daddy, I won't make a sound and we'll go to the zoo." I thought Jason was going to cry.

Gearing Up For Preschool

Aidan appears to be mostly back to normal now that we are settled back in and he is looking forward to starting preschool full time tomorrow. Mommy is also looking forward to it but I also know that it means more rigid sleep schedules, lunch preparation, and additional monthly expenses. The new school costs a bit more than the previous daycare and since he was only there part time this summer, we've not yet felt the pinch of the expensive tuition. We were there this past week for orientation and know more than ever that it will be worth every penny.

Yesterday we went to a birthday party for a friend from his old daycare where he was able to visit with two of his best friends from there. He seemed to have a great time and was asking me when he'd get to have his birthday party with his friends. Jason and I decided that we'd work on getting a small party together for him in the coming weeks and just explain to people that we couldn't get it all together earlier because of our trip to D.C.

Home Sweet Home

I think Aidan is glad that things are getting back to normal around here. We got in late on Monday, Cassie and Rebecca left on Tuesday morning, Grandpa left on Wednesday, and yesterday we visited the preschool he went to part-time this summer, the same preschool he'll start full time on Monday. I've been staying home this week rather than hiring a sitter since our semester is going to be pretty busy and we won't have a lot of time together.

D.C. went well. I spoke with 10 schools, all of which have many positives. Jason and I had a great time with old friends and it was nice to hang out in D.C. as adults without Aidan even though we missed him terribly. Aidan seemed to have a wonderful time with Aunt Cassie, Rebecca, and Grandpa. I hear stories of picnics at the park and the baseball birthday party. There are hundreds of little toys everywhere that they picked up. One day they even drove to Natural Bridge for the day.

Busy Times

What a busy time this has been for our little family. I've finally begun collecting preliminary data for my dissertation and I'm gearing up for my eight job interviews in D.C. next week. The Nana-nator has been here off and on for several weeks, which has thrilled Aidan. Not to mention that she has been instrumental to my sanity through the free childcare, housework, errand running, etc. This weekend she is staying with me while Aidan and Jason visit with Rebecca, Aunt Cassie, Uncle Bo, and Uncle Jim in Gatlinburg.

Jason reports that Aidan is having a fantastic time playing with Rebecca and I'm certain he's ecstatic that she and Aunt Cassie are coming to stay with him while we are gone for my interviews. It's been reported that Grandpa is also planning to visit his two beautiful grandchildren while we are gone. Hopefully having everyone here will distract him so that he won't notice that Mommy and Daddy are gone on his birthday. I can't believe my baby is turning 3!

The Wonders of Coffee

This morning was rough. Aidan loves to be home with Mommy and Daddy and even though he has a great time at school, he always asks to stay home. Today he used stall tactics, which made us very, very late. As we were driving and he was complaining about how I forgot to get him a drink, I realized that I hadn't had any coffee. That's why I wasn't taking it well. No coffee.

By the time we got near Starbucks he had stopped crying and was being pretty nice, so I decided to get what we both needed. When I pulled up to the speaker to give my order, Aidan yelled out, "Mommy! You need coffee!" Yes, I'm a junky and everybody knows it.

I felt much better after a few sips of my light mocha frappuccino. Coffee makes me a better parent. I explained that I got him a water because he had stopped crying and seemed really thirsty and he said thank you like the sweet little boy that he is. And then we went to school. The End.

Baseball, What Else?

Last night Aidan and I spent some time at the baseball park. He's a boy possessed by the baseball bug. He begged me to take him to the batting cages "with the dirt." Since I'd never taken him to Shillito-- Jason always takes him out there-- I didn't really know where to go. Once I found the baseball park, Aidan knew exactly where to go next. We practiced for a while, watched for a while, and then practiced some more.

Baseball parks are interesting. There were five games going on at once, kids playing, parents yelling. Aidan took it all in. He commented to me that boy running around didn't have a ball. He couldn't understand why they wouldn't have a ball at a baseball park. He wouldn't leave until it was dark and it was clear that everyone was leaving.

Afterward we ate at Fazoli's, where we ran into a woman who asked us if we had been at the baseball park. I said yes and she went on about how she had been watching us and how I had been "really working with him." I sort of laughed and said, "Yeah, well, it's really all him. He's the one who loves it and asks us to pitch to him. We're learning right along with him." She looked at me like I was somehow covering up for being a pushy parent and said, "Well, I saw you working with him." I guess I am "working with him" in the sense that I go along with him when he wants to practice. He'll hit for a while, then catch, and then pitch. I just follow his lead.

First thing he asked for this morning was to go back out to the baseball park. He settled for practicing in the backyard. He passed on a trip to feed the ducks, a trip to the bookstore, and trip to Meijer. I'm telling you, he's obsessed!

Downright Charming

I'm pretty sure that my perfect little boy has been returned to me. Since he's been at the new school, he is back to his old self. We have so much fun together. Mom and I first noticed it the first week of his new school, the same week that she was here helping out. What we noticed was that Aidan was complimenting everyone on everything. It was adorable!

This week I've noticed a few things, the most significant of which is his saying "please" and "thank you" in a sweet little voice whenever he wants something. Now don't get me wrong. He still has little boy issues. Tonight at dinner he threw a handful of rice at Jason. The difference was that when he got corrected, he picked up the rice to avoid punishment. Every single grain. Previously he would have just thrown more rice to see what we were going to do. Ah, the joys of discipline consistency across caregivers! Who would have ever thought it? Oh yeah, we did think of it.

On another note, Aidan had his 3 year check-up today in anticipation of his birthday in a few weeks. He's perfectly healthy and right on target in every way. He didn't even have to have any shots.

Aaargh!

Things here have been a bit hectic but I've been trying hard to have a good time with Aidan when I'm with him since I'm neglecting a lot of work when I don't have childcare. Yesterday we hosted his friend, Emma. She was in his old school but was removed when her mother walked in to find milk allergic Emma eating cheese flavored goldfish crackers. We had too much fun together yesterday and Aidan was sad today that Emma couldn't come over after school.

I found a package in the mailbox addressed to Aidan from our friends Amy and Craig. I yelled to him that he got a package and he yelled back from the potty to please bring it to him because he wanted to see it. He was very excited about seeing what was in the package and was grinning from ear to ear and I helped him open it. We were surprised and delighted to find these.

I explained what they were and opened them so that he could see them. He was so excited that he couldn't stop grinning from ear to ear. I got such a kick out of the concept, then my amusement mixed with how adorable my little guy was in his excitement, and this caused me to start laughing. My laughing caused him to laugh, which led to our uncontrollable laughing for a good ten minutes. There we were, he was on the potty and I was sitting across from him on the tub edge. And we were laughing. It was hysterical.

Once we gained our composure, Aidan insisted that I read it to him. "Perfect for cuts, scrapes, shark bites or other minor boo-boos." We lost it all over again.

And then he insisted that we put them away and not use them unless he gets a boo-boo. I had to make him put one on his already bruised forehead for fun. Somehow he knew that these were very special bandages. I'm pretty sure his Halloween will somehow involve pirates.

Famous Last Words

Last night Jason was refinishing hardwood, I was cleaning the house, and Aidan was playing in his room on top of the mattress that's in the middle of his floor (since our bedroom furniture is in the living room, we had to sleep somewhere). Aidan had a big plastic tub that he'd just emptied his toys from and just as I glanced in to see him stepping into the tub I hear, "I'm going skiing and I'll be real careful!" I began having flashes of my future in many emergency rooms. Yeah, I think we're in for it.

In other family business, Nana left yesterday with her little dog, Lil' Bit. Aidan and I had to visit the pet store for hermit crab supplies. Aidan had to buy a toy for Lil' Bit and can't wait to give it to her when she visits next. Over dinner he told his daddy that he wants a hamster. He loves to watch them run at the pet store. I'm not taking him to any pet stores that sell dogs. No way!

Wrapping Up Our Week

Aidan's Nana has been in town this week helping us on Aidan's days off from his new school. While she's been here, Jason and I have been refinishing the bedroom floor. Jason has also been able to work late several nights and I've been able to take care of issues relating to my employment crisis. Overall I'd say it's been a good week for us, even though it's been really busy and all of our bedroom furniture is in the middle of our living room.

As far as Aidan's new school goes, things seem to have gone very well. He's yet to give me too much information about his days but he does tell me that he likes the toys there. He also has brought home some cute and creative art projects. The teacher reported today that when asked what he was making him sad, Aidan said that he missed his mommy. Nana and I took the rest of the day off to take Aidan to a movie. Aidan, unfortunately, fell asleep pretty early in. Overall I'd say the movie was decent. Nana had no comment.

First Day At The New School

We got up really early this morning but we were well rested since we'd gone to bed pretty early last night. We had our Krispy Kreme doughnuts from yesterday and watched a little Lightning McQueen. At about 7:30 Aidan was ready to go and wouldn't take no for an answer. He had a bit of a cough so he was worried (as was I) that they may not let him stay. They wouldn't let us in until 8:00, so we took our time by going over to Starbucks.

Once we got there we went around to look at everything and to meet the few kids who were already there. At first he went back and forth between the toys and me. When he seemed like he was engaged in the classroom, I just ducked out. He didn't seem to notice. I called at 11:00 and they said he was doing well. No issues. When I picked him up at 1:00 the teacher's only concern was that he insisted on walking up the slide, even when corrected.

When we got in the car I asked Aidan about walking up the slide. He said that the teacher wouldn't let him walk up the slide or get on the stage. When I explained that these are rules that he has to follow because he could fall he replied simply, "I won't fall. I'll be careful." It was like talking to Jason. Same logic. Same reasoning.

Aidan told me some general stuff about what he did today but nothing much. He only remembered the name of one child. The teacher had commented that he'd done a great job of socializing with the other kids, even though he didn't know them. Jason said they later saw a child from his class and although Aidan remembered the child, he didn't know the name. I'm sure he'll get used to everyone and learn names soon enough.

To me the best indicator came when I was getting Aidan out of the car after a trip to the store. I asked for his help and when he helped me, I said thank you. He looked up at me and said, "My teachers never say please or thank you to me." I inquired as to which teachers and he said, "My old teachers. My new teachers do."

Tomorrow, Tomorrow

Tomorrow is the first day at the new school. It was recommended that we take him over there today to show him the building, so we loaded up in the car with Aidan's next door friend and drove across town to see the new school. The friend really helped with talking up the "park" (playground). Afterward we went to Krispy Kreme. On the way back home we drove by the school for a second look. I promised that I'd stay with him just until he makes some new friends and he said he'd like that. His behavior has definitely been better and my hope is that he'll figure out quickly how to fit in at the new school. Tonight before bed we'll make his lunch and get his clothes out in anticipation. Since Aidan has to be there at a particular time, we plan to implement the new schedule, which will consist of a family breakfast. I think he'll really like that.

Just When I Thought It Wasn't Working

Even though Aidan had fewer time-outs than he had the day before, I ended my day frustrated and doubting the effectiveness of Mommy Boot Camp. We had a rough night where Aidan woke up repeatedly asking for Mommy. Daddy just wouldn't do. He does that sometimes when he's feeling anxious or insecure, and Jason and I both independently settled on the assumption that he was seeking security from Mommy and adjusting to the new rules. It's an old behavior left over from our nursing relationship.

So we got up this morning well rested, did the potty thing, washed hands without a fuss, and ate breakfast. Once we were ready to go about our day, we got locked out of the house. I was sure that our wonderful day was about to go South. We were meeting friends at the movies but still had plenty of time, so Jason came to our rescue. Aidan was so excited about the movie (he lost both a trip to the movies and swimming yesterday as consequences of his behavior) that he refused to get out of the car while we waited for his daddy. Once Jason got to us with keys, he was ready to go.

We met some girls from our old playgroup to see Surf's Up, which was pretty cute. Aidan did very well throughout most of the movie. I never had a moment when I thought we might need to leave, even though one mom did leave with her child who was getting a little unruly. Afterward Aidan invited Kate over for a play date, as he called it. He behaved himself the entire time, which was amazing considering that he ended up taking his nap extremely late in the day. We had one instance when he started to lose it but pulled it together when I said, "Aidan, you're going to that place. Think about what you are doing. Calm down. Let's do this another way." The other mom commented that even some adults can't pull it together like that.

I'm very glad that we had a day of positive reinforcement for a change. Now he has back to back days to compare. One where he has serious consequences for poor behavior (yesterday), and one where he has fun consequences for good behavior. It was also very nice to have some fun with my boy again. We'll continue to be pretty strict on him this weekend in anticipation of the new school on Monday. Hopefully we'll be able to get him excited about his new adventure!

The Saga Is Almost Over

Well, I had words (strong words) with Aidan's teacher again yesterday, so we don't plan to take him back there. I'll have Jason go over to pay them for whatever else we owe and to pick up the rest of Aidan's things. I continue to be astounded at the level of ignorance at which this woman operates. I cannot believe that she is in the position she holds. Just to give you some insight on the conversation, she told me that my son was a bully; that she doesn't discipline because she doesn't know what to do and that parents complain about their children being disciplined; she has 18 years of experience (she's counting raising her own child and various childcare jobs) and that Jason and I have no other experience other than being the "parents of one."

I strongly explained that there are behavioral modification techniques that she is seemingly unaware of and that I hope that she acquires the skills that she needs and learns how to apply them. I also explained that our child's behavioral issues began the very week that he started her class, to which she excused as "he was younger in the other class" and "it's just the age" and "he's not learning this stuff at school, he's getting it from home." When I pointed out that he started her class four weeks ago and that four weeks is not a significant amount of time, she insisted that it's been longer than four weeks. This woman needs a calendar. It's been just over four weeks.

I'm so glad to have that over. Those poor little kids left in that class. The rest of the week Aidan will be at home at "Mommy Boot camp." Already today he's been in time out several times, mostly for mistreating his daddy. I'm so happy to be really cracking down on him before he gets to the new school. He responds well to clear, consistent discipline that's based on clear, consistent rules. What cracks me up is that an entire semester of Psychology of Learning can be summed up into exactly that statement. Reinforcement, redirection, and punishment (as a last resort) administered consistently will modify behavior. The teachers at his former daycare can't figure that out. Amazing.

Anyway, hopefully we'll have him back on track by Monday. I don't expect him to be perfect but anyone who knows him knows that he's not a terror by nature. It's time he showed that side of himself again.

One More Week

I realize that Aidan doesn't start his new school for another week, but we've been taking on preliminary tasks to get ready for the new school and schedule. Yesterday I went to the grocery store to buy items that Aidan might take in his lunch. Everything has to be Kosher, which I'm not used to shopping for, but I'm pretty practiced at noticing labels. It was funny, I'd check for the hekhsher and then check for allergy information. I was surprised to see that lots of Meijer brand products were Kosher, while many of the same items from other brands were not. I think I also saw the trend that Kosher items tend to be made in either the US, Canada, or Israel, so there is less concern about the recent problems with imports from China.

I'm very glad that Aidan will be taking his lunch each day. Anyone who knows me knows that I fret over things like Mad Cow, Salmonella, E. Coli, and problems people have from eating meat. That's not to mention the long term health problems from eating the wrong food. You have to start early. I'm not saying that I won't pack some crackers or white bread in his lunch or that he won't get anything processed like prepackaged fruit cups, pudding, or applesauce. But I promise it will be far healthier and tastier than what he's been getting for lunch.

I saw in a catalog that Lillian Vernon makes a lunch bag that matches his suitcase and backpack. I either didn't see it before or just didn't need it, but I'm glad he'll have the matching set (and I wonder where he gets his obsessive need to match everything). He'll be so cute with his backpack full of daily supplies (change of clothes) and his matching lunch bag packed full of Kosher food. The lunch bag is on backorder. He won't get it in time for next Monday but he'll have it in a few weeks and definitely in time for the school year.

Besides getting ready for the eating aspect, we've also been talking a lot about the new school and trying to get Aidan ready for the adjustment. I plan to stay with him on the first day until he starts to make some friends and then I'll leave him for a few hours to give him room to bond with the class and teacher. I'll probably be more stressed than Aidan.

Target 1: Behavioral Issues

As I've blogged previously, one of the many problems we've been having with the current childcare situation is lack of discipline. Aidan's behavior has been just this side of tolerable for about a month or so. We've done what we can to correct it but he spends a lot of time elsewhere. Yesterday when I'd correct him he'd say things like, "_____ spits on people." or "_____ hits people." or "Other kids don't say thank you." Obviously, I explain why it's important for him to comply but under our current conditions it can feel like a losing battle.

Fortunately for Aidan, the new school is all about courtesy and loving others, treating them well, etc. Jason and I are really cracking down now in an effort to get him as close to "in shape" behaviorally as we can. Before these new teachers, he'd learned to handle his frustration really well and he'd ask for things he wanted in a polite way. Lately he screams and whines for everything and he completely melts down when he's not getting his way. We have a very difficult time dealing with it but I think we're on the right track. We've been talking with him each time we are correcting it to help him decide on more effective forms of expression.

I'm actually sort of excited about having to send Aidan's lunch each day. One of my major complaints with the old childcare was the food. They have a really nice cook who is very "old school" in that she cooks tasty food that is not all that nutritious. As I was making out my grocery list (which is looking expensive), I was reminiscing about the early days when we all ate extremely healthy food. We've really let that slip but this will be a good opportunity and a good reason to begin again. Plus all of his school food must follow Kosher, which will require that we really think through each food selection, allowing more time to contemplate overall nutrition.

We're so looking forward to watching him this next year. Aidan really flourished in his last class and bonded well with the teacher. I know that this school will be great for him developmentally. All of the kids there are smart and adorable, so Aidan will fit right in. He'll no longer be at the very top of the class, but that's probably a good thing. He really needs to be in the middle of the pack so that he can strive to catch up with those more advanced. Competition seems to be a good motivator for him. Hmmm...I wonder where he gets that.

We're All Set And Feeling Good About It

Our poor little guy came home with a fever last night and asked to go to bed at 7:30. When he woke up asking for food (because he hadn't eaten dinner) he threw up. Although he seemed somewhat better this morning, I kept him home with me. We watched some TV, then went out for a bit to run some errands.

While we were out we stopped by his new school to check it out. Yes, that's right. He's enrolled. He saw the school, met his summer teacher, met some kids, and played a little on the playground. We talked with them about the peanut issues. The summer teacher already knew about it and told us that she's previously had training on peanut allergy and how to use an Epi-pen. To be thorough, we've decided to hire a nurse who will go there sometime soon to give a refresher course on food allergies in general, peanut allergy in particular, safety and prevention, and how to use the Epi. We're feeling great about choosing this school.

Any doubt or guilt that I was having about him losing his friends dissolved today when I got an email from another parent. One of the parents who complained with us to the director initially found her daughter, who has a milk allergy, eating cheese flavored goldfish crackers yesterday for afternoon snack. So, after all the issues that we had with the teachers not getting it right, which included an interaction on tape between the teachers where the teacher was attempting to guess at this same child's food allergies, the same teachers screwed up again. When the parent asked about it, the teachers again pushed it off on someone else (the kitchen) and then blew it off by saying that they "didn't think about it." When the parent talked with the director, more excuses. They left yesterday and don't plan to go back. Yeah, I'd say I'm happy with our decision.

Still Evaluating...

Yesterday after school we went swimming with one of Aidan's school friends. She and another little girl from Aidan's class are looking into the same preschool. We loved it too, but they only take certain types of people, so we're excluded. I'm not too heartbroken about it, but it is a really nice school. Let's just say that we cannot provide them with the documentation that they require for admission.

We visited another preschool yesterday that we really liked and they are able to get him in sooner rather than later. He could start July 9 on a three day per week schedule and then go full time in August. We love this school, the director, the teachers, and the curriculum. We probably will enroll him but we still need to work something out with them about the peanut allergy. Because this preschool is Jewish and they do not allow meat to be sent in lunches, many parents apparently send peanut butter and peanuts often as the protein component. Above all else, we have to ensure that Aidan will be safe. We're confident that the director is willing to work with us on this and I plan to look into hiring a professional to train their staff on the dangers of food allergies.

Still more news on the current childcare situation. When Jason dropped Aidan off this morning, the director pulled him aside to ask whether he'd be interested in being the parent representative to the childcare council. Shocked and caught totally off guard, Jason blurted out that we plan to move Aidan to another school. I pointed out that a better response may have been that he needed to talk with me about it and then we'd deal with it later, but Jason told me that he was so surprised that he didn't think that fast. So, of course, Jason didn't offer her an actual explanation for why we are leaving.

I felt obligated to then call her to explain. Apparently she's very proud of herself for all of the changes they are implementing based on Jason's observations and recommendations. I refrained from telling her that I think her changes are misguided and have no real opportunity to fix the situation that we've been dealing with. Instead I focused on the fact that, even if the changes are perfectly executed, the current teacher has told parents that not only is she not going to teach a preschool curriculum, but that she does not believe in that approach for this age group. The director's response was, "I'm really surprised to hear that because I feel that we made that pretty clear in the interview process. That's what we do here. We pride ourselves on our preschool curriculum." Uh, yeah lady, that's right. This is what we've been trying to tell you about this teacher. Get it now?

I then went on the explain that we have not signed any enrollment papers but have found another place that we think will work out for us. But that we have a few more issues to work out. The mom who went swimming with us last night told me that she moved her daughter previously and that she adjusted fine. For me, the adjustment for Aidan is the biggest concern. I'm sure he'll miss his friends. And, really, we will too. We have relationships with the kids and the parents. Hopefully we'll be able to keep some of those relationships going until we move.

Preschools, Skinny Friends, and War

I've looked at three facilities this week. I think I may have found the one but it's quite different from what he's used to. But really, anyplace would be different. His friends wouldn't be able to move with him as they only have one spot and we're still waiting to hear if he'll get that spot. If he does get it, he'll move to going there 3 days a week July 9-August 3, then he'll have a week break, then go full time during the regular school year. I'm hoping for the best.

I picked him up early yesterday and we went downtown to visit our friend. She recently had weight loss surgery and boy, did she look smokin' hot! We really enjoyed the glass elevator and the free fruit. And, of course, the visit with "Wee" (as Aidan refers to her). He carried some flowers for her desk but complained the entire walk that they were "so heavy." She taught us how to clip the ends so the flowers will last longer and she was so nice that she even gave Aidan the orange flower, which is his favorite color and the only reason he chose the bouquet that he did!

Last night before bed we were reading Return to Neverland. The first page says that there is a war going on. Aidan says to me, "Mommy, what's a war?" So I tell him it's when people fight.
"When big men fight and want kill each other?"
"Well, yes. And sometimes women too."
"Do they kill people?"
"Well, yes. They kill each other."
"They kill people like me? Like us?"

This was difficult for me to hear him ask because I know that children his age and just as innocent are being killed in war elsewhere. So I woosed out and said, "Well, we don't have a war going on, so we're safe. There's no war here in our town." Then Aidan said as he was taking the book from me, "I don't want to read this book. I want to read a happy book." And that was it. Conversation over. I found out later that Jason had a similar conversation the night before. I guess he was checking to see if our stories matched. He must suspect that sometimes parents lie for your own good.

Honestly, I thought about not being entirely honest with him. But I couldn't look into his face and make up something that he'd later learn was fabricated or half-truths. I didn't go as far as to tell him that we could be in a war or that other little kids halfway across the world are being blown up each day. I spared him the extra information that might haunt him. But I also communicated to him that I'll always be honest with him, even when it's not easy to be. And to me, the more important thing is that I didn't pass judgment on war even though I don't believe it's the absolute answer. Although I'm certain that he was able to read the sadness that I have when I think about war or try to put into words something that I'm not entirely sure I understand. I'm guessing there will be many more of those conversations!

Our Morning Delay

Aidan delayed school all morning. Jason went off to work and then I wrestled with him through breakfast, then he insisted that he had to take a bath (2 year old + pancake syrup = bad scene), then we got ready and were on our way. The bath was actually fine because I had to do hair and make-up anyway. It kept him busy.

Beforehand and on the way he told me all about how he doesn't want to go to school there anymore and how he wants to go back to his old class with his old teacher. Just so happened that we ran into his old teacher in the parking lot on our way in. She is very worried about our kids and their parents. She's such a wonderful, reasonable woman. I shared with her what we've been going through and she divulged that other parents have talked with her about it. I expressed my concerns that the director is not able to handle this or other situations that may arise. She tentatively agreed. I also talked with her about other schools that we've been visiting that might be a better match for our child. She seemed to understand that as well.

As I was leaving I promised Aidan that I'd pick him up after nap. That's in four hours. I'd better get some work done.

I Really Need to Find a Preschool

Wouldn't you know it, more issues with the school. Here we were going along, everything was improving. I certainly am still looking to move him but ensuring that he is safe for now. And then another parent called to let us know that she went to pick up a video tape of yesterday and was denied the tape. Not good. Not good at all.

When we talked with them on Monday about the various problems that we saw on the tape, one of the issues that came up was the overall veil of secrecy and protection. This director protects her teachers and herself. She seems to have little regard for anything else. It goes back as far as our peanut allergy scare, when this same woman gave Aidan the peanut butter that led to his initial anaphylaxis. First of all, she was breaking the law by giving him a food substitute that was not approved by the parent. Secondly, when they told me he'd had an allergic reaction they said things like, "I have no idea what it might have been. We investigated all possibilities. We think it may have been some flowers on the playground." Come to find out, one of the possibilities that came up was the peanut butter they served him for lunch but that fact was withheld from me entirely. Another teacher in Aidan's room said to me, "I may be fired for telling you this, but I told them it was the peanut butter and they just blew it off."

So, now you ask, "Why would you stay there when you had that terrible experience with them?" Well, ask Aidan's father. It was his idea. Something about we'd get better results from people who already went through this with us and that they probably were internally denying what had occurred because they just didn't want to accept that they'd almost killed a child with peanut butter. But in light of recent developments, they seem to have a history of covering their butts at the detriment of the children.

So back to yesterday's tape. The parent who was denied the tape-- we'll call her D-- called us extremely angry. For Jason, this was finally the last straw. Finally he is angry and has stopped giving them leeway. Personally, I feel that every decision the director has made throughout this ordeal has been suspect. The biggest problem being that she's allowed the teacher who physically tossed the kid into the wall to stay in that room. This was also the teacher who was verbally abusive on the tapes.

So basically the director has decided to suddenly change policy and restrict the video tapes. There are several problems with this but the biggest is that this is an attempt to limit our information about our children and it is a blatant display of self-protection that she is attempting to label confidentiality. So when Jason went in he had words with the assistant director, as did D and D contacted the Childcare Council of the church. So now we're going to the minister and we'll see what they think of the situation and of how their staff has handled it. D reported that the council member who she spoke with had lots of concern.

At least two of the other kids besides Aidan are gearing up to go elsewhere in the fall. We'd love to send them all together somewhere to make the transition easier but we'll see if that works out. We've coordinated so that we are looking in similar locations. I've found one that I really like but Jason is not on board there. I'm not sure at this point how much that matters to me but I guess I still have to consider his opinions.

Current Developments

Our boy is coming home pretty happy in the evenings. He also seems to be at a developmental milestone. I'm not sure how to describe it, really. Jason and I have both noticed it. He seems to be able to understand more complicated information than ever. He also correctly reported to me yesterday that Jason had called about another daycare on our street but that Jason didn't like the place because they had no cafeteria or playground. He then correctly recalled that Jason had mentioned that I had also expressed dissatisfaction with the place. It was surprising that he could recall so much information so accurately.

There have been other little things that we have both noticed too. I'm more sure than ever that even if this childcare facility were to clean up their act, he really needs a place that he can learn at capacity. It's clear in five minutes of talking to his head teacher or even the director of his current school that he will not get what he needs in the next year if he stays there. I have two preschool visits lined up for next week, so let's hope one of those works out.

We also have an update on Aidan's baseball abilities. On Tuesday they played baseball at school and the report was that Aidan learned to slide into base both feet-first and face-first. We found this odd since we've never played baseball with bases (we just let him hit or pitch), I think Jason is becoming a believer in reincarnation. After years of his father's insistence that reincarnation is real, Jason may be sliding into that mindset. It's pretty funny to watch Jason's head spin as he seeks an explanation for what he sees developing. He really needs some verifiable explanation for everything. There seems to be two possible explanations rolling around in Jason's head. The first is that Aidan is some kind of genius child that picks up everything extremely quickly. This explanation scares the crap right out of him. The second explanation is that Aidan is reincarnated from some baseball legend. Funny that he tends to go toward the less concrete. Scientists and psychologists don't usually do that.

Searching for Preschools

Well, we're definitely on the hunt for new childcare. I've pretty much decided that Aidan needs to be in a preschool setting rather than this setting for the next year. I have a list of four that I will visit over the next week or so. I'm hoping Jason will also be involved in the decision process, but I'm not sure what his position is exactly. He seems to feel like there is a minimal standard that we can expect and it won't get better than that standard. I disagree. There are pros and cons in every option. To me, the current option is no longer heavy on pros. He needs a structured, sophisticated learning environment. It's that simple.

Childcare Crisis Update

Well, we met with the director yesterday. So much has happened in the interim. Teachers have gone off on parents. Accusations have been thrown around that the "ring leaders" of our "clique" are gunning for the teachers' jobs. As if we have nothing better to do than try to get some teachers fired. It couldn't possibly be that we care about how well our children are cared for. Anyway, none of that matters now because they've all seen the video. They've all seen the quality of care that four sets of organized parents were demanding answers for. A teacher who previously stated to a parent "this is my classroom and I'm not changing a thing" hugged that parent this morning and told her she wants to start over. The kids were outside having a great time playing baseball and Aidan told that parent "I hit a home run!" Oh, things are better there. But the teacher who flung one child across the floor and into the wall is still there. I have concerns.

Basically I feel that Aidan is not in any real immediate danger. I know that for right now the teachers are concerned for their jobs, have seen the tape themselves, and are working hard to right these wrongs. I feel, however, like the director should have fired the teacher who was obviously the biggest problem on the tape, I'll refer to her as the drill sergeant. This is the woman who flung the one kid, she's the one who yells at the kids arbitrarily. Her best discipline is yelling beneficial things like, "Do you want to go to the office?" (Remember, they are 2. They don't know what that means but they know it doesn't sound like something they'd want to do.)

In my opinion, the failure of the director to fire the drill sergeant shows a lack of good decision making. That one woman's job is not worth the welfare of those children, nor the reputation or licensure of the facility. If the parents of the hurt child (the parents indicated that their child had a large bump that was explained only by the video tape that we gave them) decided to file a complaint or a lawsuit, there is no possible way that the director could justify to her superiors why she kept this individual not only in the school but in the same classroom. This gives me a lot of anxiety.

The result is that we are keeping Aidan there only until we find an alternative. Since he's now 3, we can enroll him into one of the great preschools in town. Unfortunately, it will be more expensive and most have limited or no activity in the summer but that's just what we have to do. We have to find a facility where solid decisions are made and he will have the intellectual activity level that he had in his prior classroom. I think we've found two potential spots, so I'll keep you posted.

I Pulled Him Out

Aidan isn't going back to school until we get this straightened out. On Thursday I picked him up and his nose was bleeding. The teacher had no idea what had happened, this was the second mark on him in a week at pick up time and both times they offered no explanation. In the case of the bloody nose she hadn't even seen it. Obviously, this was a problem. I went into the office, where the director was out until Monday. I pitched a little fit and told them that Aidan would not be attending on Friday and may not come back at all. I said that I was fed up with the state of affairs and I will see to it that the problems are fixed or we will leave.

On Friday another parent called me crying because when she dropped off her child, the teacher started yelling at her and calling her a "ring leader" who wants to get her and her other teachers fired. I felt really bad for her, so I called the assistant director to let her know what has been going on. I was pretty angry and crappy with the assistant director and told her how this entire situation has come about, why we are angry (because we were all blown off when we talked to them about the problems), and why we banded together to form a coalition (because we felt we might be heard and addressed if we all went together). I said a lot of other things but I was so angry, there's no telling what.

Our meeting with the director is Monday. I'm not sure how it will all go down but I'm evaluating what I will be happy with and what will not be enough for us to stay there. I think Jason and I will have to sit down and figure out what those boundaries are. One mistake that I wish I hadn't made is that Aidan has witnessed most of my intense anger with the school first hand. This was obviously not intentional but I think it has confused him a lot. Every time he's heard me talk about it he asks me to hold him. I've decided to only discuss it with Jason when Aidan's not around. Unfortunately, Jason was out of town so we were discussing it on the phone for a few days when we were able, which led to Aidan's witnessing it. And, of course, I'm sure it didn't help for Aidan to see me lose it the day that he had the nose bleed.